| Sex and Pregnancy |
| Written by Jane Brown | |
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There's a lot of information out there about sex before pregnancy, but there's less discussion of sex during pregnancy, in large part because of our society's tendency to dissociate pregnant women as objects of sexual desire. Despite this social hang-up, sexual intercourse remains an issue for couples expecting a child and many parents-to-be have questions about sex during pregnancy -- how safe it is, intimacy issues, etc. Nine months is a significant amount of time in the course of a relationship, and how a couple addresses sex during this time can have a significant impact on the long-term success of the relationship.
Many couples worry about the safety of sex during pregnancy, feeling concerned that intercourse could potentially harm the unborn child. Sexual intercourse cannot directly harm your baby because the unborn child is protected by a thin-walled bag called an amniotic sac and the muscles of your uterus. Also, a thick mucus plug is sealing your cervix. While these facts probably don't sound like much of a turn-on, the bottom line is that your partner's penis cannot come into contact with the fetus during sex. Women should also not be concerned about an orgasm causing early labor. The contractions you feel during an orgasm are entirely different than the ones you will feel when giving birth. Now, here's the rub, all of the above holds true only for women having a normal pregnancy. A "normal pregnancy" is defined as one that has a low chance of miscarriage or early labor. Your doctor or health care provider can ascertain whether you're having a normal pregancy, or if you're having a high-risk pregnancy. Some common risk factors for pregnancy include: a history of miscarriage or pre-term labor, multiple fetuses (twins or triplets), a leakage of amniotic fluid, vaginal cramping or bleeding, a weak cervix, or placentia previa, a condition in which the placenta hangs low, covering the cervix. Your health-care provider can advise you about the advisability of sex during your pregnancy, taking into account your previous medical history and current status. If you have concerns about the safety of sex during your pregnancy, don't be afraid to ask your health care provider's advice. While it's probably safe to have sex during pregnancy, you may not feel up to it, or you may find that your sex drive has dramatically increased. Sex drive during pregnancy differs from woman to woman, and may fluctuate wildly during the course of a pregnancy. During the first trimester, some women may find the nausea and exhaustion associated with the early stages of pregnancy leaving them too tired or uncomfortable to have sex, while others may find the changes in hormone levels and the freedom from worry about contraception to be an aphrodisiac. A bonus of pregnancy for women is that the increase of vaginal lubrication and blood flow to the genital area during pregnancy can make it easier for women to have an orgasm or become multi-orgasmic. Physics may become a factor in your sex life, as your changing body may make some familiar sexual positions or techniques uncomfortable or awkward as your pregnancy progresses. This doesn't have to be a downer, however, as the changes may encourage you and your partner to try new things you might otherwise have not tried. Some possible alternatives to missionary-style sex during pregnancy include more oral sex, mutual masturbation, spooning or woman on top. You and your partner may also want to add to your intimacy by engaging in massages or baths together. Your partner may also experience an increase or decrease in sexual desire during your pregnancy. Financial or relationship stresses or worries about the responsibilities of parenthood may inhibit your partner's libido. Other men experience an increase in sexual desire, finding the pregnant form to be incredibly desirable and erotic. The important thing to remember is to keep an open line of communication between you and your partner about sex during your pregnancy. A prolonged lack of intimacy or lack of desire can have potential negative impacts on the health of a relationship, which could be detrimental to raising a family together. Even if you and your partner are unable to have sex for a time, you can maintain the intimacy of your relationship by staying connected on an emotional and spiritual basis. Frequent phone calls, e-mails, text messages and expressions of affection can be key in maintaining a close, but non-physical relationship. Remember, pregnancy is a time when you and your partner should grow closer, and good communication is key to this process. |
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